Was I Ever Your Friend?
Time started: 10:05pm
Place: My room
Weather: Cold
Mood: Hurt
I just discovered a friend of mine since the age of 10 blocked me on msn. His name is Andy. I was talking to my friend Rebecca and she was talking to Andy. I thought "oh ok...I must've not seen him on my contact list" so I went to look for him and couldn't find him so I asked Rebecca what his screen name was. When she told me I found it in the offline section...then I knew he blocked me...
Wondering if I really did anything wrong I checked the last conversation I had with Andy through my message history and it was me asking how he was going with his new life in Brisbane. I haven't spoken to him since before I went to Malaysia in early December so I thought I had lots of catching up to do. As far as I could tell...there was nothing wrong with the conversation. We discussed the subjects we were doing and our new lives at uni.
I showed Aaron, Andy's best friend, our last conversation to see if he could find why he blocked me. Aaron simply said "lol, too many questions"...I was puzzled "So he blocked me because I asked too many questions?!?!" and he said "they're annoying". Aaron, whom I've also known since 10, really shocked me with that. He's always been really nice and made people feel good about themselves...you could imagine how hurt I felt. "Well considering I haven't talked to him for months and I didn't get to say goodbye to him when he left...I was only trying to be nice by seeing how he was going!!" and his response was "but seriously...they're annoying!". I had it then...I just appeared offline and blocked out the entire world. I was too hurt to talk to anyone...I still am as I make this post. Two of my friends whom I've known the longest out of everyone still within contact of me, had made me felt completely worthless...
Maybe I'm just overreacting but I can't help feeling so put down. Here I am trying to acknowledge that I am indeed worth something. That has been a challenge for me throughout my life. My parents for starters weren't the best at making their daughter feel good about herself. I guess my "friends" just reassured my worth...nothing...
I guess I shouldn't ask questions anymore...
Time finished: 10:18pm
Weather: Cold
Mood: Scarred...
Place: My room
Weather: Cold
Mood: Hurt
I just discovered a friend of mine since the age of 10 blocked me on msn. His name is Andy. I was talking to my friend Rebecca and she was talking to Andy. I thought "oh ok...I must've not seen him on my contact list" so I went to look for him and couldn't find him so I asked Rebecca what his screen name was. When she told me I found it in the offline section...then I knew he blocked me...
Wondering if I really did anything wrong I checked the last conversation I had with Andy through my message history and it was me asking how he was going with his new life in Brisbane. I haven't spoken to him since before I went to Malaysia in early December so I thought I had lots of catching up to do. As far as I could tell...there was nothing wrong with the conversation. We discussed the subjects we were doing and our new lives at uni.
I showed Aaron, Andy's best friend, our last conversation to see if he could find why he blocked me. Aaron simply said "lol, too many questions"...I was puzzled "So he blocked me because I asked too many questions?!?!" and he said "they're annoying". Aaron, whom I've also known since 10, really shocked me with that. He's always been really nice and made people feel good about themselves...you could imagine how hurt I felt. "Well considering I haven't talked to him for months and I didn't get to say goodbye to him when he left...I was only trying to be nice by seeing how he was going!!" and his response was "but seriously...they're annoying!". I had it then...I just appeared offline and blocked out the entire world. I was too hurt to talk to anyone...I still am as I make this post. Two of my friends whom I've known the longest out of everyone still within contact of me, had made me felt completely worthless...
Maybe I'm just overreacting but I can't help feeling so put down. Here I am trying to acknowledge that I am indeed worth something. That has been a challenge for me throughout my life. My parents for starters weren't the best at making their daughter feel good about herself. I guess my "friends" just reassured my worth...nothing...
I guess I shouldn't ask questions anymore...
Time finished: 10:18pm
Weather: Cold
Mood: Scarred...
posted by •°¤*(¯`°ƒåήğזє°´¯)*¤°• at 9:27 pm
2 Comments:
That sucks! :( Feel free to ask me as many questions as you like *huggles*
aww...thank you *hugs*
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